Journey of A Thousand Meters
by C1ockworks
Summary: Suzuka and Yamato start their sophmore year as a couple. What conflicts will they face? Who will their relationship effect and will it affect their ability on the track team? R&R please. Epilogue is up! Thanks to all who supported the fic
1. One Step

Firstly, I own no part of Suzuka or nothing about it, Don't sue plz

Ok this is my crack at my first Suzuka fic. I accept flames and good stuff too. R&R plz

* * *

"So then she finally said 'Senpai, I can't go out with you anymore. There's this other guy I like'." I said trying to keep as calm as possible. I was excited that Asahina and I finally got together. I felt great. I really don't know what else to do now.

"Well I'm happy for you, Yamato." Yasunobu said as he took a bite of his corn dog. "I'm glad that you didn't waste a whole year of your life for nothin'."

"Thank you, I appreciate that." I replied sarcastically.

"No really. I'm happy for you." he retorted with a mouth full of food. "And you did it without my help. I'm proud of you, man."

"I just hope it lasts." I sighed, resting my elbow on the table and propped my chin on my fist.

"It will, you know what she's like. Just don't do anything stupid." he said rather loudly.

"Is he hounding you again?" said Hashiba as she walked by our table. "I don't see how you put up with him."

"No, no. He's not hounding me." I sighed.

"Turns out that he and Suzuka finally hooked up." Yusunobu nearly shouted. Hashiba's face lit up, mine sunk into my folded arms.

"Really? Oh my goodness, Yamato. Congratulations." she beamed.

"Do you have to be so loud?" I whispered. I didn't want Asahina to know that I've been telling people.

"Well, you worked so hard I just thought that you'd want to be recognized for it." Hashiba shrugged as she put her tray on the table and sat down behind it.

"Well recognize me after you see us together. What if people find out? She'll think I've been going around telling everybody." I said.

"Telling everybody what?" Asahina said wearing her usual emotionless gaze.

"Uh. . . , Asahina!" I said uneasily. It's amazing how even though we're together she still makes me nervous. "It's n-nothing."

"It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out, Yamato." she sighed. "I don't care if you tell your friends about us, just don't go crazy with it." she said softly before she just walked off.

"Uh, okay. I won't." I said before laying my head down on the table in defeat.

"So how do you plan on maintaining this relationship?" Yasunobu asked.

"Didn't you just say that If I don't do anything stupid that I'll be fine?" I said, my face still planted on the table.

"You don't have anything to worry about Yamato." Hashiba started. "Just be yourself and if it doesn't work out then it wasn't meant to be."

"What she means is when you two break up then she's available." Yasunobu said through cut eyes. "But like I said, it's not good to rebound with your friends."

"You are one sick little boy." Hashiba shook her head as she pulled her chopsticks apart.

"I'm not sick. Maybe it's you. You're the sick one." Yasunobu growled. "It takes a sick person to know a sick person."

"I'm not the one talking about rebounding with your friends." she replied as she started into her noodles.

"Yes you are! You've been trying to get with Yamato ever since he joined the track team!" Yasunobu yelled.

"Cut it out you two. Asahina's still in here." I whispered loudly.

"Well it wouldn't have mattered because he's liked Suzuka since before school started last year." Hashiba screamed back.

"Are you even listening?" I said again, now covering my head with my arms. I could feel Asahina drilling holes in my head with her gaze and I don't even know where she sat.

"It didn't seem to stop you. You kept giving him all those private practices and forced him to take you out on lunch dates." he shouted.

"Please?" I said softly.

"They weren't lunch dates. And I was trying to help him with his baton work." she said competing with his loudness. "But then you wouldn't understand because unlike you Yamato isn't a slacker."

"So if you had a chance at him right now; if Suzuka wasn't your best friend and they weren't together right now, would you try to get with? And tell the truth." Yasunobu bellowed.

"SHUT UP!" I yelled and slid my chair back as I quickly stood. I hadn't really noticed that people weren't really even paying attention until I started shouting, the whole cafeteria grew silent. So to keep myself from looking like a complete fool and embarassing Asahina, I walked out of the cafeteria. I didn't know what to do or where to go after that so I just leaned against the wall by the door. I ran both my hands through my hair and rested my head against the wall. _It's over, _I thought. _She hates me, even more than she usually does._"Ahh! Why am I such a stupid idiot!?" I yelled, banging my head against the wall after every other syllable.

"Being a stupid idiot isn't bad." Asahina said, standing on the opposite side of the door. My head whipped around quickly. "They cancel out so I stupid idiot is a smart person, or at least an average person."

"I'm sorry for all of that in there." I said, rubbing the back of my head bashfully. "I tried to get them to stop but. . . ."

"It's okay." she replied. "They're still in there going at it. Now they're arguing about who made you mad."

"They fight like a married couple." I said, retreating back against my side of the door. "I'm sick of it."

"We used to fight like that," Asahina said quietly. ". . . more or less."

"Yeah, I guess we did." I said, rubbing the back of my head again and letting off a goofily awkward smile. "We turned out okay, right?" I regretted those words as soon as they left my mouth.

". . . . I suppose. . . . We are a couple now." she whispered.

"Yeah," I replied in my usual uneasy tone. Almost right after my statement, the bell for last period rang. The hall quickly filled with students. I made my way through the bustling crowd toward Asahina. "You want me to walk you to class?" I asked. Unfortunately we weren't in the same class anymore.

"No, that's okay. I can manage," she said distantly.

"Well, okay." I replied slowly. "I guess I'll see you at practice then."

"I guess you will." she said softly. "Bye." she waved and disappeared into the rolling crowd.

"Bye." I sighed, jamming my hands into my pockets. I don't know what it is but it feels like were in a dead drift. We're not getting any closer but it's not like we were any less social than we've always been. I mean the most we've ever done together as a couple was walk to school holding hands that one time. I guess it'll get better. I hope it does. I hope I can be the man she needs in her life. I don't want to let her down. I mean, it was a big step for her to get over Kazuki. I don't want that to be in vain. I suppose I can use what I've learned from dating Honoka. I'm gonna need some help.

"Yamato." came Hashiba's voice.

"I don't want to hear it." I said quietly.

"Listen Yamato, I'm sorry if we embarrassed you in there. We had no right to be loud about your relationship with Suzuka." she smiled apologetically.

"It's not too much of a relationship, really." I sighed. "She acts so distant. I don't really know what to do."

"Ask Hashiba, maybe she'll go shopping with you to find her something nice." Yasunobu said in his usual obnoxious tone. "Then she can make you buy her lunch again and maybe you'll fall in love with her like in one of her dreams."

"Mind your own business, we were talking and it had nothing to do with you." Hashiba scoffed.

"You're one to talk. You butt in when me and Yamato talk all the time. . . ." he started. I didn't even adress it this time. I just walked away. Their bickering isn't helping me. I need some help and I don't know who to turn to. Maybe I can talk to Nana, she seems to know quite a bit about relationships. Yeah, she'll help me.


	2. For Me

Alright everyone. Thanks for all the support and reviews. Originally this and my other Appleseed fic were going to be updated alternately. But since the first chapter of this story almost has just as many if not more reviews than my whole Appleseed fic I decided to go ahead and update this one. And another thing, for all of you that read the manga and really know what happened after Yamato and Asahina started to go out then I'm sorry because I've only seen the anime and am really sort of going off of what I think might've happened so bear with me guys. Thanks again for the reviews and here's the next chapter. Seems pretty appropriate that I would update this on Valentines Day

Gray clouds were fast approaching as I stared blankly at the high jump bar from my position near the starting line. As usual, Asahina was all over my mind during practice. We hadn't spoken since lunch and practice was nearly over. We had been exchanging looks all through practice but never made direct eye contact. I don't know if I'm affecting her but she's definitely affecting me. I can't seem to get any faster than 11.53 seconds and I know that I'm much faster than this. I don't want her to think that I'm slacking off from being the best sprinter in Japan just because we're going out.

"Akitsuki, you're up," Miyamoto-senpai called from the starting line.

"Okay," I answered as I approached the starting blocks. I crouched down to readjust them to my starting position. By now I could do this without even looking at what I was doing so I spent the extra time to take a peek at Asahina. When I looked up she was already on a running start. She planted her feet and gracefully rose and weaved over the bar. She looked so flawless, so perfect. Everything she does is perfect. The way she jogs is perfect, they way she speaks is perfect, she even falls on the landing mat perfectly. She's smart, she's beautiful . . . . and she chose me, plain old Yamato. I sighed and turned my attention to the hundred meters of pavement in front of me. A few stray raindrops fell on my hands followed by a small rumble of thunder. I rose, walking to the front of my blocks and bent down. I placed my hands down behind the line and secured my feet against their respective blocks. I looked forward to show that I was ready.

"Let's hurry before it starts to pour down out here." Miyamoto started. "On your mark. . ." My eyes were locked on the finish line. This is my final sprint for practice today and it feels like everyone's watching. So I guess this is it. This is how I can prove myself to her, where I can show her that she didn't make a mistake. "Get set." he said again. I pressed my fingers against the line a bit tighter. This is the only place where I can achieve something at least close to her level. This is where I can try to give her what she deserves. All was silent for a spilt second. Then came the loud bang of the gun and the clink of my push off from the blocks.

I was nearly hypnotized by the constant tapping and scraping of my feet on the pavement and the pounding rhythm of my heartbeat. I was completely focused on nothing. My mind went totally blank, except for the thought of Asahina. Was she cheering for me? Was she even paying attention to me? What is she thinking right now? I'd give anything to know what she's thinking right now. Am I running fast enough? Will I beat my time? . . . My time! Before I realized it I was almost halfway down the track. I had to push, Asahina's watching me. I can't let her down. The finish was no more than twenty five meters away now so I started to accelerate in small intervals and kept going until I made it across the finish.

"Time." said one of the guys at the line. I came to a pounding stop and immediately doubled over with my hands on my thighs. Suspense built as it seemed like the world was waiting for the announcement of my time. I hope it was fast enough. I wasn't focused. I hardly even paid attention to my running style. I looked at my timer and through my peripheral vision saw Asahina looking at him too along with the rest of the team on this side of the track. "10.23 seconds." he yelled.

"Yes!" I yelled as I bounced around the entire field. "I broke my old record! I can't believe it!" Everyone applauded, even Asahina. A bright flash of lightning filled the sky followed by a loud and lingering rumble of thunder.

"Alright everyone practice is over. Get changed and go on home. See you tomorrow." Miyamoto yelled as people rushed around the feild in a mild panic. Everybody quickly gathered up the equipment and ran for cover inside the school building. I quickly followed, slightly upset that my celebration was cut short by bad weather. As usual, I'm the last one inside. Conversation was buzzing around the lockers as everyone put their school clothes on over their practice clothes. I opened my locker and unfolded my uniform. I removed my wet shirt and replaced it with my button up shirt; I slipped my slacks on over my shorts. I kicked my track shoes off and put on my outdoor shoes. I reached for my bag and noticed that my locker was empty except for my indoor shoes. I forgot my umbrella again.

"I'm such an idiot." I whispered to no one in particular.

"I know, that's why you have me." said a voice from behind me. I turned to the source and saw a completely changed Asahina with an umbrella in hand.

"Thanks a lot." I sighed with relief as I took the umbrella from her hand. "I really appreciate it."

"You don't have to thank me. Let's just hurry and go." Asahina said quietly.

"Right, lets go." I replied uneasily as I opened the umbrella at the door and waited for her to step under it. A now steady rain poured as we left the school. A few of our teammates waved and greeted us as we left. Not too many words other than goodbyes were said as we continued down the street. The only sounds were the raindrops steadily tapping on our umbrella and the occasional car passing by. The thunder and lightning seemed to have died down. She kept a fair distance from me, not so much as to be out of the umbrella but not so close that we would sometimes bump shoulders."So . . . um, nice practice today." I said, attempting to break the barrier of ice she had between us.

". . . Yeah," she replied distantly.

"I saw your last jump. Pretty impressive." I said again this time looking at her with a smile.

"Thanks," she said almost as distantly as before. I paused for a second, trying to think of something to say that wouldn't piss her off.

"I didn't think I would beat my time. I was hardly focused and kinda lost myself in thought." I chuckled with my free hand finding its way towards the back of my head again.

"Mmhmm." she said. By this time I was completely disheartened. I didn't even want to try to talk to her anymore. I really don't know what to do now. And as much as I don't want to there's really only one thing I can do.

"What's wrong, Asahina?" I asked in a more-concerned-than-annoyed tone that I hoped wouldn't start an argument.

"Nothing's wrong. Why would you ask me that?" she replied with a bit of annoyance in her voice as well.

"Well, you seem so distant lately. You seemed happy over the weekend and this morning so I just wanted to know if it was something I did or- -"

"No, no it's not you." she said quickly. "It's just . . . I don't know."

"Oh, well okay. But is there anything I can do?" I asked.

"No, it's okay. I'll be fine." she said.

". . . Okay" I said softly. She didn't say another word after that. We walked the rest of the way in silence. It felt so awkward, like we were starting our whole relationship all over again. Why does she make this so hard? I want to get closer to you but you won't let me. I quietly prayed for another car to splash her or another rumble of thunder so that she would jump to me for protection, so I can feel needed again. But we were nearing the apartment so the car opportunity was quickly fading and the clouds were starting to break as well. We turned the corner to the apartments. I withdrew the umbrella and handed it back to her as I followed her up the stairs. We turned the corner at our floor and stopped at our respective doors.

"I've got to clean the bath tonight so if you need me I'll be down there." I said as I reached for my keys.

"Okay." she said as she gracefully unlocked her door without any type of error. Or maybe it just seemed that way to me. I watched her until and opened my own door and closed it behind me. I threw my bag down and absently kicked off my shoes. I leaned against the door and let out a rather large sigh. I let my head roll to the right as if I could see through the walls and at Asahina. "What do you want from me?" I asked her, foolishly hoping for an answer. When it didn't come, I lifted myself lazily from the wall and started for my room. I rummaged through my drawers for my work clothes and pulled them out with reckless abandon. My whole mood from breaking my record had deplenished. All my energy was gone too. I wasn't sure how I would clean this bathhouse. All I wanted to do now was sleep. And maybe I would dream about her, how things were that day and that smile. That smile she had just for me. That's all I could ask for right now. For her to have that beautiful smile on her face . . . for me.

* * *

It feels a bit short to me. But my opinion doesn't really matter now does it? Review Please!!!!!


	3. Void

Sorry for not updating in forever. Been kinda busy with this whole college thing. It's not easy, but anyway I'm going to try something different. I don't think I've ever done this too successfully, but I'm going see how this works. I want to switch it to Suzuka's POV but, I might spoil some things I'm planning on doing BUT! I might make the story more interesting I'm really considering it but it might lenghten the story too. So since I really am torn between the two I'm going to let my trusty readers decide, send me a review with your opinion on the matter and depending on my responses I'll carry it out. But for now lets just keep it with Yamato.

Back and forth, back and forth goes this task of scrubbing the bathhouse floor. I almost hate doing this. I would like to hurry before Miho comes down here to 'supervise'. I want to be with Asahina. I want to spend time with her and straighten _us_ out. I'm sick of being like this; not being sure if she's still interested in me or not. Maybe she's only still with me because she doesn't want to look like a jerk by dumping me so soon. Or maybe she's taking pity on me. I don't know anymore. I just want to go back to how things were before I told her I liked her. Back when we were friends. We used to get along so well.

"But it's so soon, maybe I should just wait and see happens." I said to no one in particular.

"You're not finished yet?" said a painfully familiar voice from the door. "You should really hurry, people _do_use the bath y'know."

"I know, Yuka. I'm almost done." I grumbled, I didn't want to look at her because I wasn't sure if she was decent.

"Why the sour tone, Yamato? More Suzuka trouble?" she said again. "And you can look at me, I'm not naked."

"Oh sorry . . . ." I replied as I continued to finish scrubbing the floor. "She's been acting really distant lately."

"What did you do now?"

"Nothing," I retorted as I turned to face her. She was actually fully dressed. "Why is everything always my fault? Why can't it be hers?"

"I don't know. But you're right. It could be her." Yuka said as she folded her arms patiently. "Maybe she's just not into you."

"Very funny." I scowled.

"Gosh, Yamato. Lighten up, I was just kidding." Yuka smiled.

"I'm glad you think that my life is a joke." I said sarcastically. I was sick of people not taking me seriously. These are my emotions people just seem to want to play around with. She sighed and folded her arms

"I know this is frustrating, Yamato," she started. "You've been wanting this for a long time, and now that you've finally got it it sems like it's crumbling in your hands and there's nothing you can do to stop it."

". . . Well, yeah," I replied, my eyes followed the grout lines in the tiled floor. "So what should I do?

"Well, nothing." she said frankly.

"Thanks a lot." I grmbled defeatedly.

"No, seriously. If she's acting distant then give her some space. Then she'll react. But it could go either way." Yuka said as she rested her shoulder against the doorway.

"What do you mean 'both ways'?" I asked.

"I mean either she'll feel more comfortable without you buzzing around her which could make her reconsider dating you. Or she may feel lonely and may miss you." she explained. "But that is up to her."

"Well I'm not around her nearly as much as I used to be. So does that count?" I asked. Even though this sounds like a good idea, I'm still second guessing this.

"Nope." Yuka said. Then she stared me straight in the eyes. "Giving her space means to not always make every effort to see her. If you have to try to get to her then don't do it."

"Alright. I got it." I said, gripping my broom to finish scrubbing the last bit of floor.

"Okay, well I'm going to change into my robe since you're almost done." she said with a smile. "But you should go talk to her first." Yuka added as she turned to leave.

"Huh?" I said softly.

"If you _still_sense that distance between you two, then that's when you should maybe try to back off a bit." she said. She started again back towards the steps to the apartments. "Who knows? Maybe this'll work out for the both of you."

"I sure hope it does."

Yeah kinda short I know. But I wanted to get some input from you guys before I start the next chapter. So get your voice heard.


	4. Indifference

Dinner, as usual, was extremely awkward. Hardly any words were spoken other than the occasional comment aunt Ayano made to break the sheet of ice. But they were usually shut down by Asahina's short straight-forward answers. I should really be used to it, but right now all it's doing is making me uneasy.

"I . . . um, broke my 100 meter record." I said.

"That's great Yamato! Congratulations." Aunt Ayano said happily.

"That's great Yamato." Miho said.

"Thanks you guys." I said with a smile. I didn't even bother to look at Asahina.

"Yamato's a great runner." Asahina said.

"Thanks Asahina." I said with a widened smile.

"So you really shouldn't be too surprised that he broke his records. He can't do much more than get better." Asahina said coldly, taking a bite of her rice.

"Thanks Asahina." I said sarcastically. After that comment, all was quiet again. Goro's meows were the only things that broke the silence. Surprisingly, Asahina and I finished at the same time. I stood to put my dishes in the sink. "Thanks, again Aunt Ayano." I said as I turned towards the kitchen. Asahina stood before I was completely around. "You want me to take yours?" I asked, holding out my hands for her dishes.

"I'm perfectly capable of washing my own dishes, Yamato." She replied coldly.

"Fine." I said.

"Just leave them in the sink. I'll take care of them later. You two must be tired." Aunt Ayano said quickly.

"Um, okay. Thanks." I said.

"Yeah, I really appreciate it." Asahina bowed and brush past me towards the kitchen. She returned and left the apartment. I did the same, trying to catch p to her before she got to her room.

"Hey, Asahina!" I shouted, she was already up the steps as I shut the door behind me. "Can we talk for a second?"

"I'm not in the mood Yamato." She said softly.

"I promise it won't take long." I said, sprinting up the stairs after her. "Please?"

She took a deep breath and sighed. "Okay, fine. But only for a second." She turned towards the hall and stopped for me at my door. I walked over to her and opened my door for her to go in first. She walked in and I followed, closing the door behind us.

"So what's going on with you?" I asked. "Why are you acting like this?"

"Nothing's wrong with me and I'm not acting like anything." She replied. "Why is it that something has to be wrong with me?"

"Because you've been acting cold and distant again and it's starting to bother me." I said.

"So because you feel that I'm acting 'cold and distant' I'm bothering you?" Asahina shot back.

"Well it's making me feel like it's my fault." I replied. "I don't know if it's something I did or said, but I wanna make things right again."

"Just because we're going out now doesn't mean that whatever I'm feeling always has to do with you Yamato." She nearly growled.

"Why are you getting so angry? I just asked a simple question." I said, folding my arms patiently. I didn't like how this was going. All this aggression she has all of a sudden isn't good for either of us.

"And I'm giving you a simple answer. I am fine Yamato. There's nothing wrong with me." She said. Annoyance was clear in her voice as she folded her arms a bit more aggressively. "So is that all you wanted? I have things to take care of."

"Yeah, that's it." I said flatly. I decided to retreat. Maybe some time apart would be better for her. Maybe we did kinda rush into a relationship. It felt like we kinda just dropped into it, there was hardly any time for her feelings to be mutual. Maybe I'm just trying too hard. Maybe I'm not trying hard enough. Or maybe I just want this too badly. Whatever it is, it's pushing her away. That's the last thing I want to happen. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow morning then." I said as I opened the door and held it open for her.

"Yeah, I guess." She said as she walked past. I slowly closed the door behind her and leaned against it. I let out a relatively large sigh.

"Why is this so impossible?" I asked no one in particular. "Why can't I make this work?" I shouted, slamming my head against the door with every word. It looks like this space thing may have to be put into place. The more we're together the more we seem to argue. I rolled my head over towards the wall separating her room from mine. I looked at it almost as if I could see right through it. "Why are you doing this to me?" I said rather loudly. I stared at the wall for a while before I kicked off my shoes and collapsed into my bed.

Eh, kind of an awkward ending but I wanted to start Suzuka's part. I know it's been a good while since I updated but schools almost over now so I'll have more free time until college so keep a look out.


	5. Longing

SO here it is, the oh-so-anticipated Suzuka POV. Hope I don't destroy it.

_There you go again . . . . How can you stand to hurt him so much? He doesn't deserve this and you know it. _I thought to myself as Yamato closed his door behind me. I sighed and shook my head at how I can never tell him exactly how I feel.

"Truth is, I've been hurting him since he confessed to me." I thought aloud. I leaned against his closed door. Even though I'm sure he's leaning against the opposite side, I feel so far away. I wish I could stop being so immature and talk to him. The more he tries to fix things, the more I push him away. Why can't I show how I feel about him? I sighed as I walked towards the rail overlooking the back of the complex. I folded my arms on the bar and rested my head on them. Just then, I heard pounding against Yamato's door

"Why can't I make this work?" came his muffled shouts. "Why are you doing this to me?"

"I want to make it work Yamato. I really do," I softly replied. "But I don't know why I can't show it." A tear rolled down my face as I watched the moon disappear behind the clouds. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. All I could see was his beautiful brown eyes, his messy spiky hair that no matter how messed up it is it always looks good, that goofy smile of his, his soft features…. He's so beautiful. And I never really noticed it until now.

"I don't want to lose you Yamato; I just don't know why I can't tell you." I said slowly. I ran my hands over my face and backed away from the guardrail. I turned towards my door and rested my hand the knob. I couldn't help but stare at his door. I wanted him to come out and talk to me. Maybe if I wait for him he'll come out to try to apologize or something.

I spun around and leaned against my door. My heart was softly pounding in my chest, but at a normal rate. I guess I wasn't really anxious but I did want him to come out. But how would I act if he did? Would I put him down again? Would I do something else to hurt him? I know I don't want to but I didn't want to go off like I did before either, I just can't bring myself to say how I really feel. How did I do it when he took me to see the fireflies? Even though I was half-joking then I still got the words out. And I really don't know how I did it at Tsuda-senpai's gravesite. I took another deep breath.

"Tsuda-senpai," I mused. "What is wrong with me? Why can't I tell him how I feel?" I looked back towards the rising moon and could almost hear his voice saying; "You'd better hurry up before you miss your chance again. Like you did with me." I tried to fight back the tears realizing that that was completely true. I never got to tell Tsuda how I felt. Now I have the perfect opportunity with Yamato and I choke repeatedly. I don't understand why I can't express myself to him like I used to, when we were just friends. I don't know, maybe we're better off like that. Then I can't hurt him like I do. But…, I know it will tear me up inside to see him with someone else, even when he was with Honoka I could hardly bear to see them together. Even then, it was my fault that they broke up. Ever since that day he saw me practicing after school he's been tied to me and I've been slowly cutting him loose since then hardly even caring if he fell or not. Now, it's completely different. I'm still cutting him off but now I care and I want him to know that. Suddenly I heard Yamato's doorknob wiggle. My heart leapt out of my chest. I tried my hardest to hide the redness that I was sure set in on my cheeks and looked out over the balcony, my arms folded. Yamato stepped out of his room wearing the same clothes he was wearing before. He looked right at me before he turned to close his door.

"What are you still doing out here, Asahina?" he asked, his usual nervous tone was absent. I was actually looking for it.

"I can't look at the stars or do I need to check with you first?" I said coldly. I can't believe I allowed myself to say that.

"You can do what you want. I've gotta go lock up the bath." Yamato said blankly before he walked off towards the steps.

_Do something! Say something! Anything! Just stop him!_ I screamed mentally. "Yamato, wait." I said coolly.

He stopped and looked over his shoulder at me. "Yeah? What is it now?" he said with that same emotionless tone.

"I'm sorry, about a little while ago and just now." I said. I've never felt this on-edge talking to him before. "It's just… things are kinda crazy lately and –-"

"I understand. Don't worry about it." He said with a small smile. That faded as he turned back towards the stairs.

"Yamato…" I said quietly but he kept walking. I guess he didn't hear me. Every step he took after that tugged at my heart until he was out of sight. I know I've always been the one pushing him away but now it feels like he's not even putting up a fight anymore. I've never felt this distant from him, not even when I 'hated' him. But I need him now. This is driving me crazy. I sighed and took a breath before I turned back to my door.

"I'm in love with you Yamato." I said softly as I reached for my doorknob. "I just can't bring myself to tell you."

MAN there it is. This was soooo tough for me to write. But I hope it's good. I kinda felt myself identifying with Suzuka here. My heart was pounding and I was actually tearing up while I was writing this. Well I hope you guys like it. Cause that's all that really matters.


	6. Distance

Okay so I got a gist of the manga and it's crazy. A lot of stuff happens that has NOTHING to do with what I'm writing. But it could swing that way but not purposely.

"You want something to eat before you leave Suzuka?" asked Ayano. She was coming out of her apartment to water the flowers in the courtyard by the bathhouse entrance as I walked down the steps in my workout clothes.

"No thanks. I'll get something to eat on my way back." I said with a smile.

"You sure? Running on an empty stomach can make you weak." She said with that cheerfully contagious smile that you'd have to be completely heartless to deny. I found the corners of my mouth rising.

"You've convinced me." I replied.

"Well everything's on the table." She said cheerily.

"Okay." I unzipped my jacket as I walked into the apartment but then froze completely before I could get my shoes completely off.

"Morning, Asahina." Yamato said plainly as he sat alone at the table in his pajamas, hair in an organized mess as usual. Once again, I found myself missing that uneasy tone he always used to have.

"Hey Yamato." I replied, trying not to get nervous or anxious and fall back into my extreme defensiveness. "What are you doing up so early?"

"I thought I might go catch the train and hit the track outside of town for a bit today." He said before taking a bite of his rice.

"Oh ..., um, okay." I said as I sat down across from him to where my food was. He didn't say another word afterwards. Usually he's desperate to start conversation. "So how's your new running style coming along?"

"It's coming along nicely." Yamato replied. Then he just kept eating his food. What is going on? Why is he acting like this?

"Well that's good." I said as I started into my food as well. Then there was an awkward silence. I sighed mentally as I tried to keep myself from exploding at him. I felt so off-balance. I wanted him to talk to me. Just say something to me Yamato.

"Well I'm done." Yamato said as he finished his last bit of food. He stood and carried all of his dishes to the kitchen. Concentrating on the running water was the only thing keeping me calm. I felt all this emotion building up inside me and I couldn't describe any of them except for rage. Why is this making me angry? I don't get it. All I have to do is tell him how I feel. I heard him turn the water off, dry and put the dishes away. He walked back past me and headed for his shoes at the door.

"Yamato." I said. He didn't reply. "Yamato!"

"Good luck with your workout today." He said as he walked out. I took a deep breath and took another bite of rice.

"Why won't you talk to me?" I thought aloud. I felt hot tears ready to stream down my face. And it was only making me angrier that I was about to cry. Why is he making me so angry? Why am I acting like this? Why do I feel like this? I finished the rest of my food and washed my dishes before I left. I turned the corner from the complex and I ran. I kept running, hardly conscious of what has going on around me. I couldn't afford to stop. I couldn't afford to think. I just needed to clear my mind and run. I don't need to think about anything. The only thing I need to think about is… I don't know. I don't want to think. I might think about him. I don't want to think about him. I'm not going to think about how he makes me feel. I'm not going to think about the time we spend together. I'm not going to think about all I've done to him to deserve how he treated me this morning. I'm not going to think about how much it hurts that he won't speak to me and I'm certainly not going to think about when he kissed me the first time…. I froze. I came into realization that I wondered to the park. And it was raining. And I was standing exactly where we kissed.

"This can't be coincidence." I said with a smile. "How did I end up here?" I sat down on a nearby bench and rested my head in my hands. "No matter how hard I try I can't escape you Yamato. I can't get away." So there I sat, lost in thought and enclosed in my raging emotions. I didn't know what to feel. I didn't know what to think. I didn't know what to do. I don't even know how long I've been out here.

"Suzuka?" said I voice I couldn't immediately recognize. I looked up slowly, almost forgetting that was my name. Miki was standing a bit more than fifty feet away from me with a full grocery bag and a pink umbrella.

"Hey." I said dryly.

"Are you alright?" she asked as she approached and took a seat next to me and covered me with her umbrella. "Are you and Yamato fighting again?"

"Um, I don't know. He hardly said a word to me this morning." I said weakly.

"How long have you been out here?" she asked in a concerned tone.

"…I don't know. All I remember was that I left his morning to jog and I just kept running until I got here. Then it started to rain and I've been here since." I replied.

"It's been raining for about two hours Suzuka." She gasped. "You should really go home."

"I can't." I said quickly.

"What?" Miki replied. "Why not?"

"… I just can't. Not right now." I sighed, starting to come back to my senses. "I just don't wanna see Yamato right now."

"Well, okay." She said uneasily. "Well you do need to get out of the rain, so come back to my place."

Yeah I made Suzuka go a little screwy. But oh well. I hope you guys liked it. I almost all but abandoned my Appleseed fic until this one is done. But next chapter should be up eventually


	7. Separation

Okay so I haven't updated in a while. I apologize, I kinda happen to do that a lot actually. Well um I'm back in action after a few reviews pulled me out of hiatus. So here it is Chapter 7

"Wow, avoiding you doesn't seem like Yamato at all." Miki said, handing me a towel from her closet for my damp hair. I sat on her bed with my legs folded wearing a pair of her shorts and a yellow t-shirt.

"I know. It feels so weird." I replied. "I'm so used to him buzzing around me."

"Well maybe it's because he's starting to take track and field more seriously. You did say he was going to another track to practice." Miki said as she sat on the floor against her bed. "But who knows? Maybe he did just get sick of you going off on him. You _do _do it a lot."

"I know but I don't want to." I said softly. "It's just... it's just when I'm around him I get nervous. And when I get nervous I get defensive. And then I twist around everything he says and then you know he never knows the right thing to say so we always go back and forth and end up in a fight and I don't want to do it anymore."

"Then don't." she said plainly as If that were an obvious solution.

"It's really not that easy..." I replied.

"It's _just_that easy, Suzuka." she said. "You get defensive because you're scared."

"What are you talking about? I don't have anything to be scared of." I snapped back.

"Yeah, you do." she said softly. "You're afraid that if you open your heart to Yamato completely like you were ready to do for Tsuda that you might get hurt again." I gasped. My heart began pounding in my chest. I felt tears welling in my eyes and it took everything I had to try to hold them back. I turned towards a wall to try to hide them.

"That's- that's not true..." I said, my voice shook belittling whatever seriouness I tried to have. I heard her sigh and sit on the bed next to me. Then I felt her place her hand on my arm.

"Suzuka, it's okay to be scared. Letting go of a dead loved one is never easy." she said softly. "But you've got friends who will be there every step of the way to help you through this, Yamato being number one. But if you keep shutting him out then all you'll do is push him even further away." I couldn't hold back anymore, the tears rolled down my face, my body shook. I felt so weak, like she just pulled everything out of me and laid it out in front of me.

"I-I just... I can't... tell him how I feel." I muttered. "I'm not even sure about how he feels about me anymore."

"Yamato will always love you Suzuka, no matter what you do to him or what he says or does." she said softly. I could hear the smile in her voice. "But that doesn't mean you can keep taking him for granted. You have to do something before you really do lose him."

"I can't lose him." I sniffed.

"Then tell him that, better yet show him that." she said.

"I want to. I just don't know why I can't." I said weakly.

"Just do it. Just let it out. And do it soon." she said urgently. "I can't stand to see you like this." I let a smal chuckle escape.

"Yamato always messes things up." I smiled. I wiped all the stray tears from my face and leaned my head on her shoulder. "When'd you get so wise?"

"I have my moments." she giggled. "But this'll definately cost you."

"Dinner on me tonight then?" I replied.

"Of course."

* * *

Well this chapter was REALLY short but it did get the message across. I want to lenghten then but I keep getting stuff on the chapters accomplished too soon. Well next chapter is gonna swing back to Yamato so be rady for that.


	8. Counter

Okay so like I said in some other chapter this fic is gonna swing towards the manga but instead of towards it it's gonna be more-so into it. I guess you could count this is kinda picking up where the anime ends and stopping where the manga keeps going. So any confusion that may have brought forth should be resolved. Alright, so like I said last chapter, this one is going to come back to Yamato. I may swing it back to Suzuka again but I'm not sure yet we'll just see how it goes. And another thing before I start. I'm definitely going to try to lenghten the chapters INDEFINITELY. I know waiting so long for a chapter less than 1000 words is disappointingso I'm going to do my best to draw out as much as I can without making it seem like a drawling ramble. Alright so here goes. Oh and another thing. I don't know if all the spelling errors bother you as much as they do me, but I definitely ran this through i THOROUGH spell check before I posted it.

* * *

"I still can't believe I did that to her..." I thought aloud. I hung my bobbling head as the train bumped, swayed and shook down the track. The air conditioned car and the cool temperature outside seemed pretty cold on my still slightly sweaty skin. I did work pretty long today, the sun's about to set. I hope I don't catch a cold. I don't need to add anything else to my list of problems. "I really can't keep this up too much longer. Besides, all it seems to be doing is pushing us further apart." I sighed as I stared and the little plastic things on my shoelaces. The one on my left shoe was kinda torn. My right shoe is kinda scuffed up and I'm kinda cold. Maybe I should've brought my jacket. Asahina had her jacket. She's always prepared. I wonder if she's done with her workout yet. She probably is. But then maybe not.

"Ahhh! I can't stop thinking about her!" I shouted as I ruffled my hair quickly. I was sure that everyone in the car was looking at me. I really didn't care. I slouched back into my limp, doubled over posture as the train came to a stop. I guess I scared everyone away because the car emptied pretty quickly. But it filled up almost twice as fast. It was crowded to the point where I was sure someones elbow was resting on my head. I still didn't care. I couldn't care. My mind was stuck on Asahina. I could almost hear her complaining about letting someone use my head as a armrest. _Yamato, you're so lazy,_ she'd say. _Speak up for yourself, stop being such a slouch_. I smiled to myself as the train started moving again. I slid back in my seat and slowly pulled my head up.

"Oh, I'm so sorry about that." said a soft female voice as she lifted her elbow from my hair. It wasn't really hard to recognize.

"Honoka?" I said softly.

"Oh, Akitsuki." she replied. "Where you headed?"

"Back home, I just got finished practicing on the track uptown." I said softly. "How about you?"

"I'm meeting Nana in town." she said. "Uh, do you want to come with me? Nana asked about you recently and might be happy to see you." I could barely concentrate on what she was saying. I was tired and cold and sleepy. On top of all that I still feel terrible about basically ignoring Asahina earlier.

"...Um..., Sorry but I'm gonna have to pass, I'm kinda tired." I chuckled weakly.

"Oh, right, it's okay." she said quickly. "Maybe next time then."

"...Yeah, sure." I replied. All I wanted to do when I got off this train was to get in the bed and sleep the rest of the day away. But then I still have a pretty long walk before I even get to the school, let alone the apartment complex. I wish I at least had someone to walk with. More specifically Asahina. Even in complete silence like we did coming home from practice the other day. I mean it's better than nothing. I think I'm at the point where just her presence keeps me content. But acting complacent and distant isn't helping me at all. My train of though was kinda derailed when I heard muttering somewhere around me. I blinked a bit to try to better analyze my surroundings when I noticed that Honoka was still talking. "Wait... what'd you say?" I asked sleepily.

"I asked how are things with you and Asahina?" she said again.

"Oh, um, things are good." I said emptily. "Just a little shaky right now but it'll be okay."

"Oh. Well okay. Glad to hear it." she said distantly.

"Yeah." I replied. I peered out the window and saw the downtown station pulling into view. "Well here's my stop." I said as I stood up in what limited space I had and trying not to bump anyone as the train came to a stop.

"Alright, um, be careful on your way home Akitsuki." she said, I nodded.

"Yeah thanks. See you later." I waved as I disappeared into the crowd that squeezed through the sliding door. I shoved my hands into my pockets and began to walk and noticed I had a bit of change to get a croquet on the way home. So as I got on the main street I took a few shortcuts to the store. And when I walked in I could think of a million more people I would have been better off seeing when I saw Asahina and Hashiba reading horoscope magazines in front of the counter. I almost wanted to turn and run the rest of the way home. I nearly jumped when Hashiba looked up at me from her magazine.

"Oh, Yamato! We were just talking about you." Hashiba said happily. Asahina looked at me like she didn't even know who I was. But then I wasn't surprised after what I did to her this morning.

"Hey, what's up?" I said coolly as I walked to the counter, trying as hard as I could to keep my emotions as suppressed as I could. "Hey Asahina."

"Hi Yamato." she said with a trace of ice.

"So you guys were talking about me?" I asked, not letting myself remain still and let my hardened facade fade. I turned to the guy behind the counter. "Can I get a meat and potato croquet please?"

"Comin' right up." the guy said as he disappeared to the back.

"Yeah, I was comparing you guys horoscopes." Hashiba replied as she turned her magazine around to show me.

"Oh really?" I said with a confident smirk. It really didn't feel to natural on me. "So what does it say?"

"It says we're perfect for each other." Asahina said suddenly. Hashiba and I both nearly broke our necks looking at her. My heart was pounding in my chest. It took me everything I had to not rip the magazines from their hands to read it myself. I didn't know how I was contain all this happiness. I was about ready to explode. "But then, horoscopes are nothing but superstition. It's not real. Just something someone wrote in a book."

"...Yeah, right." I said emptily.

"Here you go young man." the cashier said as he handed me my croquet.

"Thanks" I said with a faint smile to be courteous. "Well I'm gonna head back home. I've been working on my sprints all day and I'm exhausted." I took a bite and a step back.

"Well, okay." Hashiba said uneasily. "I guess I'll see you around."

"Yeah, see you guys later." I waved and walked out, pulling the dagger Asahina threw in my heart out. I almost wanted to cry again. I think this is getting much too complicated. And I don't even know if our relationship is a good idea anymore. But I don't want it to stop. I love Asahina and I want to do whatever I can to keep this thing going. I don't want to lose her. So now I have to show her again and I'm gonna fight until I fix everything.

* * *

Okay so I owed you guys a quicker update. It's still not as long as I wanted it to be but it makes up for the last one. And just so you know, when I was writing it I really wished it was in Suzuka's pov. Wow I'm getting as excited to write the next chapter as some of you may be to read it.


	9. Realization

Okay I know this chapter was posted already but when I was writing the last one I felt the beginning would go great with this chapter. So I'm reposting it with what I guess you could call an alternate ending. So read it again if you want start from where it left off if you want but just read up.

I watched as Yamato walked away nonchalantly with the croquet hanging limply from his mouth. I can't believe I said that to him. "Suzuka!" Miki whined. "Look what you did."

"I didn't mean to. It just... came out." I said softly. "But he deserves it. He always seems to act like he doesnt care." I retorted with a strong change in tone

"You can't see through that? Yamato cares as much as he always did. Did you not see his face ready to light up when you said you two were perfect for each other? And how he just sunk when you shot it down." She said as if she were scolding me. Come to think of it, I never really looked at him while he was in the store. I only saw him when he left. "Yamato's probably trying to give you a taste of how you've been treating him. And from how I see it, it's doing a pretty tough job on both of you." she said as she put her magazine back on the rack. I did the same as we walked out of the store. I placed an uneasy hand on my elbow and walked with my head hung. I felt so emotionally exhuasted.

"I just don't know what to do." I said quietly. "Everytime I want to talk calmly with him I end up nervous and start yelling. Or saying something mean like I did before."

"We already went over this Suzuka." Miki said shaking her head in disappointment. "Just don't argue with him."

"I'm trying not to." I sighed. "It's just so hard sometimes."

"What makes it so hard? You used to be able to talk to him just fine." Miki asked patiently. "Well, up until he confessed to you. Ever since then he's been fighting just to get you to look at him."

"I know. Stop reminding me." I said quietly.

"But if you want to stop this then you have to try to figure out from how it started." Miki said. "So what was it that made you feel so uncomfortable around him after that?"

"Well. . . he always hovered around me even after that. I almost never had a day where I didn't see him. I wasn't really even ready for a relationship." I said. I stopped walking at looked down at the ground. "But, over time I did start to like him and I'd try my hardest not to let it show because I really didn't want to be in a relationship. I guess it's because--"

"You were scared." Miki finished. I looked up at her with a confused gaze. "You were scared that if you opened up to Yamato that something would happen to him just like Tsuda."

"No! That's not it." I snapped back without even thinking.

"Yes it is Suzuka. I'm you're best friend. I know you. And now you're getting defensive because you're trying to cover your tracks. Because you know I'm right." Miki retorted just as snappy as I was. "If you stop shutting Yamato out and just admit that you are in love with him probably as much as he is with you then you can stop hurting each other and finally get somewhere with your relationship." I was speechless because she _was_ right. Absolutely right. I'm just not sure how I can fix all this.

" But I've done so much damage and I've hurt him so much." I sighed. "I'm not even sure if he even wants to be with me anymore."

"You're right. You've done quite a bit of damage and I'm not sure if even Yamato could put up with all this. But you've gotta try. If you just explain to him how you feel and why you've been acting the way you have then he will understand. You just have to try. And don't be afraid to tell him. Don't be afraid to get rejected, and please don't over-think things."

"Okay, I'll give it a try." I said with a bit of a smile.

"Alright. Well good luck with that. I've gotta get home." Miki smiled.

"Okay. I'll see you later." I waved as she started down the street. "Hey, Miki!" I yelled.

"Yeah?" she shouted as she turned around.

"Thanks a lot."

I slowly trudged up the stairs, my heart pounded faster with every step. I've never been this nervous in my life. Just the thought of the possibility of seeing him is driving me crazy. I started breathing from my mouth because my heart was beating so fast. I slowed my stride as I approached the last set of steps. I turned the corner and almost fainted when I saw him leaning against the guardrail over looking the back of the complex. So this was it I guess. This is where I have to let Yamato know how I really feel about him. I took a deep breath and walked towards him. I stopped behind him and grabbed my left wrist with my left hand.

"Hey Yamato." I said as straight as I could.

"Hey." he said blankly.

"Not cleaning the bath tonight?" I asked, hoping to spark a bit of small talk.

"No, I'm not really in the mood for it." he replied softly.

"Oh, right." I replied quietly. Now I was nervous _and _uneasy. "But about before...."

"Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about that, too." He said as he turned around and folded his arms as he leaned against the railing. "I think we should break up." I gasped and at that moment, my body turned cold. I could nearly feel my heart crumbling. I literally had to mentally remind myself to breathe again. I didn't know if it could show and I really didn't care but I couldn't let this happen.

"But . . . , I don't . . . . Yamato, I don't--" I started. "Well how do you know that I don't like what you're doing? Maybe I like arguing"

"It's not all about you Asahina!" Yamato nearly screamed. "Asahina I'm really sorry but I just can't keep doing this. This is killing us. If we kept this up we probably wouldn't even want to be friends anymore." he said.

"But, I--" I started.

"I just can't keep trying to please you when it's obviously not working...." He pushed off from the railing and started for his door.

"Can you stop cutting me off? I'm trying to speak!" I blurted without thinking.

"You don't have to say anything." he said as he reached for his doorknob. Then he turned to me with a weak half-hearted smile. But it was his eyes that called my attention. They looked like they were about to be spilling with tears. "I'm just sorry I wasted your time. I want to be better to you. Guess I just don't know how..." he quickly opened his door.

"Yamato wait!" I said. Before I could lift a finger to stop him he disappeared into his apartment. I rushed to his door and tried to open it but it was locked. "Yamato!" I yelled as I banged on his door. "Get back here and talk to me!" He didn't answer so I kept banging. And I'll keep knocking until I get an answer. Soon tears worked their way down my face as I banged harder, my frustration and anger powering every blow. Finally I gave in. I sunk to my knees, a tearful mess. I felt so stupid, so selfish. How could I have let my pride over take me like this. I should have told him how I felt sooner. Now it might be too late. I may have lost him forever and it's no ones fault but my own.

Well THERE it is. Now I can start on the final chapter a bit better. Because if i would have kept it like that I might've had to write another chapter. I know you guys probably wouldn't mind but it would just mean more waiting that I'm sure you wouldn't want to go through. So there it is. Last chapter is on the way.


	10. Journey

Well, this is it guys. The final chapter of Journey of a Thousand Meters. I cannot believe this. I think I started this fic about a year ago thinking 'Man no one's gonna read a Suzuka fic". But lo and behold not only did it beat out a fic that I was writing around the same time in reviews but this has become one of my favorite fics and my most author alerted. So as I said before, none of this would be possible without you guys, the readers. So all the recognition for the story goes to you. So instead of getting all mushy I'm going to start the last chapter and give you guys what you've all been waiting for. So here it is the tenth and final chapter. And one more thing. Concerning the point of view, I'm gonna switch from Suzuka to Yamato. So Suzuka's gonna have her last little bit and then Yamato's gonna finish it out.

* * *

Hours passed since we talked and I guess it goes without saying that I couldn't sleep. I just sat in the corner of my room, curled up in a ball against my bed like a child with the picture of Yamato and me on that roller coaster in Fantasy Land. Well I suppose it's appropriate since that's exactly how I've been acting; like a stubborn little kid. If only I could have just told him how I felt we wouldn't be in this mess and there's no one to blame but myself. I stared at the picture in my hand and I couldn't help but wonder if we could ever be that happy again. I make myself so difficult to love that I'm not even sure anymore. I hugged my legs tighter and stared at my wall. Everything was silent. I didn't even hear Yamato moving around in his room like I usually do but soon I did hear raindrops that quickly escalated to heavy rainfall followed by soft rumbles of thunder. The only thing that crossed my mind was that night a few months back when the lights went out. I sighed mentally at how heavily Yamato was on my mind and then once again because I don't think I could run back to him if the power went back out again. At least not now. Even still, I felt compelled to go outside and watch it and before I knew it, I was at my door. I shrugged off my absentmindedness and pushed it open.

I felt a soft yet somewhat forceful breeze hit my face as a bolt of lightning danced across the dark night sky. I closed my door behind me and stood against it. I was still a bit scared of thunderstorms and the fact that I'm out here during one is amazing in and of itself. I watched and listened as the rain beat against the roof tile and fell to the ground. Then the lightning flash and the thunder rumble. It's still somewhat frightening but at the same time beautiful. I felt goose bumps popping up everywhere. Chills ran up and down my body. Then a bright and sudden flash of lightning filled the sky followed by an explosion of thunder. I jumped back and held my hands up to my chest defensively and I believe I was shaking a bit. I knew that I couldn't have needed Yamato any more than I did at that moment. Then I realized I had no idea of what it felt like to be in his arms. I can't believe I never at least hugged him. My arms dropped from their defensive position and crossed over my chest. I can't believe that I've never even been in his arms before. I absently looked back into the sky.

"I don't even know if this is fixable." I thought aloud. "I've been so distant that I'm not even sure that he'd want to start over."

"She's so selfish sometimes," I scrubbed angrily. "All she cares about is herself. It's all about what she wants and how she feels. She doesn't even care about me. _I'm_ the arm trophy! How in the hell could she be so self-absorbed?" I paced around the bathhouse floors. I couldn't get her off my mind. It was so infuriating how she could do something like that. 'I don't wanna break up because I like being angry. I don't really care about if you don't like that I'm angry. I'm happy being angry.' I mocked mentally. She doesn't even care about how I feel. She just wasted a year of my life. How could I try so hard to impress a girl like that? I can't believe how much I've done for her for her to something to me like that! I turned to do the last part of the floor when I heard thunder rumbling. I snickered to myself a bit. "I wonder how she's doing now? She's terrified of thunderstorms. And she doesn't have her arm trophy to hold her hand this time." I kept the smirk on my face until I was about halfway done with this last bit. Then a loud rumble of thunder rolled through the complex making the wall vibrate a bit. I felt a bit of unease and kinda guilty at what I just said. "I can't be mad at her." I sighed. I finished the floors and put the broom away. "I hope she's okay…"

I left and locked up the bathhouse and watched the rain cascade onto the ground. I rushed to the stairs for some cover and slowly trudged up the stairs. When I got to the top, I froze when I saw Asahina leaning against the railing watching the storm. I guess I didn't have anything to worry about. I approached my door and turned the knob.

"Yamato," she said. "Can we talk?" I turned to look at her and she was still watching the storm.

"Is there anything more to talk about?" I asked somewhat coldly.

"…Actually, there's a lot more to talk about." She sighed. "I just hope you're willing to listen."

There she goes, showing off that maturity again. She definitely knows how to play her cards. "Go ahead."

"Well… you see, I know I've haven't been fair to you," she started. "And I know that this hasn't been an easy year for us." Her voice blended with the rain so beautifully and what I could see of her eyes light up so brilliantly in the lightning. Even though she had my full attention, she was my biggest distraction. She paused after her first statement I could tell that whatever she had to say she had been holding it in for some time. She finally sighed and turned around. She looked me dead in the eyes and I could swear I saw her eyes beginning to well with tears.

"I owe you an apology." She said firmly. "I've been treating you rudely and you never deserved it. I've been selfish and childish and you don't deserve that either." I returned her gaze with a serious one of my own.

"Well I accept your apology. I know that sometimes I can be an idiot. And sometimes I say awkward and blunt things and sometimes you just react and I take it the wrong way," I replied with a hand on the back of my neck. "So I apologize too." Then she looked down at her feet and kicked at a pebble on the ground.

"I accept your apology, too." She said, her voice was losing its firmness. "But I've still got more to say."

Whatever she had to tell me most be important. Not much makes her this uneasy. "Okay." I said, leaning against my door with folded arms.

"Well… I guess I should start from the beginning." She grabbed her upper arm. "In junior high Tsuda and I were far from close at the start. We constantly argued because I wanted things to be more serious, he wanted things to be more fun. So we constantly clashed."

"Just like we do." I interrupted.

"Yeah…," she nodded. "On his last year he qualified for nationals. The day before the race, he confessed to me and he told me not to give him an answer then but to wait until after nationals." I could tell it was hard for her to talk about by how her voice started to trail.

"…Just like I did." I said softly.

"…Yeah." She nodded again. "So I never got to tell him how I felt." Her voice was a bit shaky. "So to avoid being hurt like that again I didn't want to be in another relationship again. Then you came along. And we became friends."

"And then I confessed." I said slowly. I could understand a bit as to why she kept rejecting me and was so distant after I confessed.

She nodded. "It really shook me up for you to do that. So I had to try to avoid you but you wouldn't go away. I tried to haze you but you wouldn't flinch. I even told you I hated you. But you wouldn't give up. And as much as I didn't want to I started to like you." My heart jumped in my chest. She's liked me for some time now and I never knew. I was amazed that she did actually like me and covered it so well.

"So the more I started to like you, the farther I tried to push you away. Even then, you wouldn't quit. So eventually I did give in but I'm still afraid." She said as tears started to fall from her eyes. Lightning flashed behind her and thunder rumbled. "I'm afraid to open up to you because I'm afraid I might lose you. So I kept my feelings bottled in trying to protect myself from being hurt again when all it was doing was hurting both of us. So I'm sorry that I hurt you and I'm sorry that I was only worried about how I felt. I completely understand why you would want to break up. But I just want you to know that I love you Yamato and I want to be with you." My heart jumped into my throat. I couldn't believe this was how she really felt. But then I never really took the time to ask. I wish I had known. I pushed myself from the wall and towards Asahina. I wrapped my arms around her tightly as she cried on my shoulder.

"I understand why you're afraid Asahina." I said softly. "And I know I can't promise that nothing will happen to me but you should know I won't let just anything get in the way to get to you. I killed myself in track and field just to be close to you and now I'm the number two sprinter in Japan." She looked up at me with those beautiful eyes of hers.

"But Yamato, I –" she started but I quickly hushed her with a soft kiss. I could feel her hands flattening on my chest and smiled to myself. I broke the kiss and looked her in the eyes.

"All you have to do is trust me Suzuka." I smiled. "I promise you that I'll do my best to be everything you need me to be, all you have to do is trust me."

She smiled back. "And I promise to do my best to trust you and to be more open and patient." She held up an outstretched pinky. I met hers with one of my own as I used my other hand to wipe the stray tears from her eyes.

"Hey!" I said. "So back in Hiroshima at the bridge…?"

"I meant every word."


	11. Vicarious

I've gone over the reviews again after about a year, that I'm still getting by the way and felt moved to re-read my story. And as usual I don't think it's all that good. Found a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes that I'm too lazy to fix. But you guys love it. I'm glad you do. I'm glad you all support my work and thank God for you guys. So just as a thank you, and by popular demand, I decided to put in one more chapter. Enjoy.

* * *

On your mark, get set, GO!

We set off on a maddening sprint. I had a wiid grin on my face. I knew I was gonna win this one. I mean look at my competition. Piece of cake. We had run about 50 meters of the track already. Now here come the hurdles. Even if I don't make it over I can still at least outrun these guys. I mean come on look at who I'm racing. I've got this in the bag. Heres the first hurdle... Hah! Made it alright lets keep this going. One... two... three... one... two... three! Yes! I should run backwards just to show off a bit. Hehehe.

"Dad?"

I turned around to answer my daughter who I'm sure I had burned already. "Yes honey..." No one was there...

"Over here Dad." I stopped and turned around again and saw Fuka and Suzuka standing at the finish line.

"Oh..." I said uneasily. "Guess I'm not the sprinter I used to be."

"I guess not." Suzuka replied with a grin.

"Maybe hurdles and long distances just aren't your thing?" Fuka chuckled. She had grown so much. It seemed like yesterday she was just learning how to walk. Now she's a 13-year-old top 20 ranked junior high hurdler and an honor student. Looks so much like her mother too. I'm so proud of my little girl.

"Very funny." I said as I approached. "I'll have you know that when I was your age I was-"

"The number two sprinter in all of Japan." mocked my wife and daughter. "Honey, you were the second high school sprinter in Japan." Suzuka smiled.

"Well I was above a whole lot of other people. There are alot of kids in high school y'know." I smiled confidently. "At any rate I had to discontinue my carreer to raise my beautiful daughter and support my wonderful family." I said as I took Fuka then Suzuka into my arms.

"Yeah, yeah." Fuka smiled. "Love you, too Dad."

"Ready to go, Fuka?" Suzuka asked.

"No, I'm gonna hang around here for a little bit practice a little bit more." Fuka smiled as she walked back towards the starting line. "I'll be home in time for dinner."

"Alright, dear. Don't work too hard." I said as I waved to her.

"I won't." she replied. "See you guys."

"See you when you get home dear." Suzuka waved. We both turned and began down the street. We decided to stay in Tokyo after we had Fuka since schools were much more convient here. And everything was walking distance. We thought about moving to Hiroshima but that was pretty far and we really didn't have the money to get there and buy a house. So with a bit a saving, a few raises and some favors we managed to find a nice house right in town. It's a pretty nice place. I glad we have a good home to raise our daughter in. So far its been going pretty well but her teenage years are here so anything can happen at this point. But I'm sure everything will be fine.

"I'm so proud of our daughter." Suzuka said with a smile. She smiles alot more often now. And I'm happy she does. After all the hard times we've been through together I'm glad she can relax now.

"Aw, you say that every day." I teased. "You sound like a broken record."

"I am!" she replied. "I'm glad that she wants to do track and that we didn't have to make her."

"It's in her blood. I'd be surprised if she didn't want to do track." I said boastfully.

"And what if she didn't, Yamato?" she asked.

"Well..., then I'd still support her in whatever she wants to do." I hesistated.

"Don't try to relive your high school day through Fuka. Let her live her own life." Suzuka said calmly. I like that about her now. Ever since we had Fuka she doesn't really snap at me anymore... she moreso advises. It makes things alot more peaceful. I'm glad shes found patience.

"I am. I'm not trying to force her to run track. I'm proud of whatever she wants to be. I'm just being supportive. And since I'm supporting her in track I just want her to be the athlete I never got to be." I said. I took her hand and locked my finger between hers. "Have I told you that I love how you grew out your hair?" I looked her in the eyes with a smile.

"Almost every day." she smiled back. "Have I told you that those glasses look ridiculous on you?"

"N-no! They do not!" I stopped in my tracks. "They make me look more fatherly."

"Whatever you say, dear." Suzuka said as she continued to walk pulling me along with her.

"Well I'm still the same Yamato Akitsuki that you fell madly in love with not too long ago." I teased with a smirk.

"I suppose," she said with a smile. "Though the Yamato I fell in love with was a pain. And still is."

"Very funny." I replied sarcastically. I looked around a bit as we continued to walk hand in hand until we walked past the park. "Hey come here!" said as I tugged her down the steps into the courtyard of the city park.

"What's down here?" Suzuka asked.

"This, since it seems you have forgotten, is where we had our first kiss." I smiled as I took both her hands.

"Oh right I remember." she smiled as she looked into my eyes. "And when I slapped you three times and called you a jerk after?"

"I've rubbed off on you haven't I?" I said with a dropped expression.

"Yes, dear." she replied with a smile. I couldn't help but smile back. "Didn't you cry after-"

"That was rain. I was not crying." I replied quickly.

"Are you sure because if I recall correctly..." she started.

"Aw, just shut up and kiss me." I smiled. She smiled back as our lips met. Even after all these years it still feels the same way. I'm still crazy for Suzuka and my little Fuka. The two most important ladies in my life. They've helped me grow up so much and make my life so much brighter. I don't regret a thing thats happened to me and it's all because of them. My hand withdrew from hers and carressed her face gently. She threw both her arms around my neck and I used my free hand to pull her closer. We really haven't had a chance to kiss like this in a long time. It's a quite a breath of fresh air. She broke the kiss but still had her arms around my neck. Mine were still on her waist and cheek.

"It's been a while since we've done that." she smiled.

"Yep." I replied coolly. I heard applause from the people around us. We both looked around and blushed. "I forgot people were here." I whispered to her.

"So did I." She whispered back. I pulled her in for a hug a rested my chin on her head. "I love you Yamato Akitsuki."

"I know." I chuckled cockily. She backed away delivered a swift hit to my chest. I quickly grabbed her hand and pulled it back around my neck. "I love you, too Suzuka Asahina." I captured her lips again as the crowd continued to applaud I heard a cheer or two in the background but it all faded away as I went back into my own world with my wife and the love of my life who caputured my heart with a single high jump.


End file.
